I don't know if you can relate, but so often I will stop and realize that I've had a completely random song stuck in my head. And it's actually been playing for the past half hour.
"Whoa, how long has the theme from Leave It To Beaver been running in the background of my life?" Without even noticing, I had a soundtrack for my life playing in my mind. (My personal favorite is when it's a song I don't know the lyrics for.) Emotions, including the urge to watch porn, can do the exact same thing. When we're not paying attention, emotions can be running in the background without us even noticing. This is really important to know. Why? Because our feelings drive our behavior. If we have emotions running in the background that don't align with our goals, we will find ourselves being driven into behaviors and patterns that we don't want or intend. And this is absolutely true with the urge to watch porn. Have you ever had an instance (or many instances) when you ended up giving in to the urge to watch porn and afterwards thought, "How did that even happen?" If we're not tuned in to what's going on underneath, we will run on autopilot. And many times to a place we don't intend. What's the solution? Self-awareness. Here's what I noticed as I started implementing this strategy and began to experience the amazing feeling of real freedom: I never really even thought about self-control. It just wasn't a skill that I was using with this new approach. But I noticed very quickly that awareness was the one skill that would be pivotal to develop. Awareness gives you the ability to pause, to stop. Simply to notice. To tune in to what's going on inside of you. This one skill will serve you in more ways than you can imagine. Rather than running on autopilot, YOU are in the pilot's seat. Sound like something you would like in your life? Me too. So how do we increase our awareness? I'm going to give you the method I've used to increase awareness. And the good news is that it takes literally one minute per day. In other words, you can absolutely do this!
Here it is: 1. Every morning, sit down, close your eyes, and imagine an instance in the day ahead when you might feel the urge to watch porn. Picture that moment in your mind. See yourself in it. 2. Then, imagine yourself pausing in that moment, and noticing the urge is there. See yourself simply stopping and saying, "I'm feeling the strong desire to watch porn." That's it. Easy right? When you start taking this one minute every day to visualize yourself being aware, you'll find yourself getting better at this skill in real life. Want to start building this superpower called awareness and increase your chance of success? Practice it in your mind each morning. Remember: To increase your chance, practice in advance!