Did you ever see the movie Groundhog Day with Bill Murray? There's a major hack that you can take from this movie to help you in a real way on your journey to freedom.
In the movie, by some magical twist, Bill Murray's character finds himself reliving the same day over and over. He wakes up, and it's the same thing day after day.
Nobody else knows it. He is the only one that realizes the day is repeating. So he experiences the same day on repeat. The same thing on the radio each morning. The same people that he interacts with. The same sights and sounds.
Every day.
At first he's completely freaked out when he realizes what's happening. He can't believe that he's stuck in this loop, with no possible end in sight.
After a little while though, after living the same day many times, he realizes that he can actually use this to his advantage. If he knows the day is going to repeat and it's very predictable, he can use it to help get the thing he wants. And for him, the thing he wants is to woo a woman that he likes.
And he begins to use the predictability of the day to help him achieve his goal.
Are any light bulbs going off for you as you read this? Is there any predictability in your life that you can use to your advantage? Specifically, relating to your goal and desire of living in freedom from porn?
Let's take a minute to explore how predictability can be a game-changing hack on your journey.
Think back. When was the last time you watched porn? Maybe for you it was earlier today, or yesterday. Maybe it was last week, or last month.
Whenever it was for you, think about the situation you were in:
What was the circumstance?
Were you alone?
Were you at home, or somewhere else?
What time of day was it? Was it in the morning? Was it in the evening?
What device did you use? Was it on your phone? Your computer?
Okay, do you have that circumstance in mind the last time you watched porn?
Now here's another important question:
Thinking about the last time you watched porn, was it a circumstance that has happened before (the setting, the time of day, the location, etc.)?
Was that circumstance, the set of events that led up to you watching porn, something that has happened multiple times? Maybe you would even say it is a pattern for you, your Groundhog Day.
I'm willing to bet that you are nodding your head (either physically or internally). Why? Because this is very normal.
With this behavior of watching porn, it tends to follow a repeatable pattern. We get into a familiar circumstance where we have gone to porn in the past, and, being creatures of habit, we remember the temporary pleasure or relief that porn brought us. And we go down the same well-worn path.
Oftentimes this happens with us barely being aware that it's happening.
Maybe for you, you thought about the last instance that you watched porn and it truly was a situation you had not been in before. That does happen from time to time. If that's you, think about the time before that. Or simply ask yourself, when do I typically watch porn? I'm willing to bet that you'll easily find that Groundhog Day circumstance for you.
Okay, great, it's a predictable pattern in most instances. So what?
Remember what Bill Murray's character did (oh, the wisdom of Bill Murray).
When he realized it was a repeatable pattern, he asked how he could use this to his advantage.
I'm making a big assumption here, but I'm assuming that you want to experience freedom from porn. I'm assuming that you want to be done living with the shame, the guilt, the anger and frustration that you haven't been able to rid yourself of this thing that's causing you so much pain.
So if freedom from porn is what you want, how can you use this repeatable pattern to your advantage?
Here's how: You can ask yourself, "When is it likely that I will feel that desire to watch porn today?"
Based on the exercise you just did above, you should be able to answer the question.
Then, when you have that circumstance in mind, you can mentally rehearse how you will handle that urge effectively when you feel it.
Maybe you won't feel that intense craving today. Maybe it will hit you tomorrow, or next week. But mentally preparing for it daily will put you in prime position to be ready to handle that craving when it floods you.
That's step #1: Mentally preparing yourself for when it hits you so that you are ready for it. This is called increasing self-awareness. It is a super-skill that will help you in so many ways.
Step #2 is knowing WHAT to do when you notice that pattern starting to unfold, when you notice that familiar desire to watch porn flood you.
The good news is that I got you covered there. I can tell you exactly what to do.
It's called the P.A.T.H. Plan, and it's four simple, actionable steps you take when the craving hits you.
You can download it for free here: newpaths.me/plan
To make this super easy for you, I even created a specific podcast episode that walks you through this mental rehearsal. It is episode 28 and 29 (with music or without) of the The New Paths Podcast. You can click on the link or find it on your favorite podcast player.
Start using your Groundhog Day to your advantage. Rather than being stuck in an unwanted loop of pain and shame, use the loop to catapult you into a life of true, lasting freedom!
Next step,
Dan