When I was 26 I joined the Air Force.
I tearfully packed up my belongings in my beloved Minnesota apartment, said goodbye to my amazing friends and loving parents and brother, and flew down to Texas where I would spend the next two months in basic training (essentially living in close quarters with 60 other dudes you don't know while getting yelled at constantly).
This was obviously a huge, life-altering decision for me, and I didn't make it lightly. I sought counsel from friends and family, I thought and prayed about it a lot. I considered the decision from all different angles: career, relationships, what would I do if I ended up not liking the military, what would I do if I did like it? It wasn't easy, but I made the choice, and signed up.
There was also one other thought I had in the back of my mind: "As an additional benefit, maybe joining the military would force me to finally kick my porn habit. Nothing else has worked. Maybe two months of basic training will get me out of the habit and I'll be free from it on the other side."
This made perfect sense to me. I had heard that it takes something like 21 days for habits to form. Well, basic training will be eight weeks, so this should form a new habit of NOT watching porn, I thought.
I left for basic training down in San Antonio in January of 2009. In March, I graduated and went on to "tech school," and eventually went to my assigned base in South Carolina to start my job.
It was at this point that I started living a "normal" life again. I had my own place without roommates, I was free to come and go as I wanted, and I had my computer and full internet access.
So, what do you think happened at that point? Had the two months of complete cold turkey cured me from this struggle? Was I now finally free?
Not at all.
As soon as I had access again, and the time alone, it was just like riding a bike. I jumped right back on and continued the pattern as though I had never stopped.
Why did this happen? Didn't I technically break the habit? Why didn't going cold turkey help me experience freedom?
Looking back now from a place of true freedom, here's what I see was missing:
I never learned how to handle that urge to watch porn when it arises. This was THE skill that I was missing.
This is also the skill that most guys don't ever even think about, let alone acquire.
Without that, whenever I was alone and the urge to watch porn hit me, it was almost automatic. I was like a robot. I had no idea how to handle the urge in a healthy, sustainable way. So it would simply overtake me. And I gave in time and time again.
So here's the great news: you don't have to go down that endless cycle of doom like I did. You have the blueprint that I so desperately wish someone had told me about.
It would have saved me so much time, and prevented so much guilt, and so much pain.
But the amazing news is that you know exactly how to acquire this skill! You CAN learn it!
How do you learn this skill? It's right here: P.A.T.H. Plan
It's laid out simply in four easy, concrete steps. So you know exactly what to do when you are flooded with the urge to watch porn.
And, just like any skill, it builds upon itself. It becomes easier over time. The urges become less frequent and less intense.
And what is the result? True, lasting, real freedom.
You have the blueprint. You have the map at your fingertips. Don't spend another day spinning your wheels. Start your journey into the fresh air of freedom!